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The Fascist Flight to Falklands by Raymond Speer

Author says: what if the ranting remnants of the British Fascist movement had fled to the Falklands in 1958? muses Raymond Speer. Please note that the opinions expressed in this post do not necessarily reflect the views of the author(s).

On April 5th 1976,Prime Minister Robert Mugabe of the Confederated Dominions met James Wilson, the General Secretary and Foreign Commissioner of the British Union of Fascists. The men were aboard the CD warship _Cougar_, which was anchored in Stanley harbor in the Falkland Islands.

Speaking a dialect of English that seemed extracted from stage plays about pirates, General Secretary Wilson seemed ill at ease but pratted on at length of the social achievements his party had given the Falklands since the Fascists fled to the Falklands in 1958.

Robert Mugabe, trim and well dressed, had risen from a backbencher in the provincial parliament of Rhodesia in the space of twenty years to the peak of the Confederated Dominions Parliament now resident at Westminister, in London. General Secretary James Wilson wore a wool cap, a thick jacket and high boots that rose to the knees of his blue jeans, Wilson kept imbiding from a bottle of brown liquid.

"We kept the faith, b'god," said Wilson. "In the name of good king Dave and gorgeous Queen Wallis, something had to be done and b'God we did it. Damn shame there had to be that fighting, but you do not get omelets without breaking eggs".

"Are you all nigs?" commented Wilson. "I thought most of the people in the Confed Dominions were still white, not colored".

Without getting an answer from Mugabe, Wilson spoke on. "That is why King Dave had to back Sir Oswald Mosley, y'know. PeeEm Baldwin had flatly refused to let Queen Wallis take the throne and the King's own brother went along with that. Only the surprise Fascist revolt saved that day.

No sooner did Prince Bertie get the firing squad than old Liz was proclaimed Queen of Canada, excuse me, the Confederated Dominions. You bastards staged a Empire wide boycott of us and brought all our trouble.

"Britain's finest hour was when King Dave and Queen Wallis signed the Iron Pact with Adolf Hitler and we went off with him and Benny Mussolini to conquer the Russian Slavs. But you Confedders allied with the Americans and helped the subhumans of the East fight back, and gave them bombs to do it".

Calmly and steadily, Mugabe said: "General Secretary Wilson, I have come to your islands not to argue with you. I'm here because the press of the world tell us that there is a famine in the Falklands and that your government is doing nothing, or perhaps can do nothing, to relieve the problem".

Bleary eyed, Wilson said: "You people say that the King hung himself and you have locked up Prime Minister Mosley at Dartmoor, as you did to Queen Wallis. I hear they are both dead now".

James Wilson told Mugabe that he "needs a shit" and a steward came to his side to escort him to the nearest rest room. When Wilson left, his associates began yammering.

"We''re only a brigade and a couple ships and an order away from restoring the Falklands to the Confederation," said the lieutenant minister of defense, Margaret Thatcher from one of the coalition parties.

"An hour or so more with General Secretary Wilson," said Mugabe, "and I might be willing to issue that order".

Author says to view other reader's comments please visit the Today in History Web Site.

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Raymond Speer, Guest Historian of Today in Alternate History, a Daily Updating Blog of Important Events In History That Never Occurred Today. Follow us on Facebook, Myspace and Twitter.

Imagine what would be, if history had occurred a bit differently. Who says it didn't, somewhere? These fictional news items explore that possibility. Possibilities such as America becoming a Marxist superpower, aliens influencing human history in the 18th century and Teddy Roosevelt winning his 3rd term as president abound in this interesting fictional blog.


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